What If?

I'm in the middle of reading the most encouraging book I've yet to find on parenting.  May I recommend Vicki Courtney's "Ever After: Life Lessons Learned In My Castle Of Chaos?"

I don't know about you, but I find myself constantly striving.  Striving to be a better wife, a better mother, a better friend.  I find myself striving to be more fit, more disciplined, more organized.  I find myself striving, and while self improvement is admirable, taking it to an extreme is exhausting.

This book touches on that, and the Lord is using it to challenge me to stop, to find contentment, and to bask in the joys of this season. In two short months my baby girl will be a year old, and while I have found such joy in being her mother, I have also been distracted by the pressure to maintain a clean home, make it to the gym, do laundry, juggle the bills and keep up with the every day grind.

In seven months my sweet boy will starting school.  Yes, that will certainly help with the strain on the pocket book, but it will also mean less time for afternoons at the park, fewer library days, and the beginning of years of sharing my time with someone else.

All of this has me thinking, what if I stopped.  What if I stopped trying to have a home that looked like a magazine spread, and instead let the little people make big messes?  What we played more and cleaned less?  What if I stopped trying to make cooking dinner an award winning production and instead made eating around the table together the prize the be won? What if I stopped worrying about sleepless nights and focused on bedtime devotions and family prayers?  What if I stopped trying to have the most disciplined workout regime and instead ran around the back yard with my kids, or played flag football, or even tag?

What if I stopped striving?

Nothing stresses me out more than the unknown.  Nothing.  And for that reason this past year has been tremendously trying

, which is absurd.  Nothing is for certain.  Nothing.   I'm not guaranteed a tomorrow, so what if I stopped striving and started living? In two months my baby girl will be one.  In seven months my sweet boy will be starting school.  What if I dared to stop striving and instead focused on living, in the present moment?  What if.....?